Are you making your child an idol?
Has the child with the problem become all you think about?
Are your days planned around him and his ‘isms’?
Is your thought life dominated by him?
Do you have a worry hunch?
A few weeks ago,while walking with Ania and talking about the ‘isms’ of a particular child, I realized my thoughts are dominated by him, which makes him in control. I felt a nudge by the Holy Spirit. ______ is your idol. He consumes my thoughts, my actions, my plans.
I think about how I can help him and it fails. I think about ignoring him and I fail. I think about his next fit and it happens and then I think of how I could have prevented it or how I should have spared the family from it. He dominates. I numerate. He controls, I reel, angry, yet in submission to his plots I bow. I walk on eggs shells, he spits out bile. I walk around covered in vomit, feeling and smelling of it, unsure of what to do next.
‘Traumatized children are afraid to be cooperative, compliant and receptive. To them, such behavior represents giving in which translates to losing. They have learned to oppose anything that is suggested by others… they are experts at counteracting anything directed by others…. they refuse to respond to anything that someone else wants. Consequently, they choreograph battles over the most insignificant issues.”- Parenting the Hurt Child
The above quote doesn’t JUST apply to children that have experienced major trauma in their early life. It also applies to children who have learning struggles and belief mistaken assumption number four -complete inadequacy. “If I do anything at all, you will discover how worthless I am, so leave me alone.”- Children the Challenge.
So, what do I do to take my child off the throne and take back my crown of parental authority? More on Wednesday! Tomorrow-Time Saving Tuesday.