My biggest frustration

My biggest frustration

This is a re-post from a blog hop I participated in a few years ago, The topic-What is your biggest frustration in the homeschooling arena?

See those kids on the right?  Those are six of my seven.  Some of them were wearing an attitude that moment. Some of them do not like being on the receiving end of the camera.

Are they my biggest frustration?  No! What is my biggest frustration?  The expectation.

THE EXPECTATION? 
HOMESCHOOLING PRODUCES PERFECT KIDS

Homeschooling doesn’t produce perfection.  Kids are kids.  Do I train them in the way that they should go? Yes.
Do I teach them Bible fundamentals?  Memory verses? God’s Providence in history?  Yes. Yes. Yes.

Guess what!  Doing all of the above does not PRODUCE robotic christian kids.  They still have bad days.  They might have a fit in the middle of Walmart.  They might think plaids and stripes go very well with cowboy boots on a ninety degree day.  They may balk at getting a family photo taken.  They may LIE.  STEAL.  CHEAT.

When homeschoolers become teens, they gradually begin to take the reigns and make their own choices.  My girls decided to kiss dating goodbye and wait for Mr. Right.  My boys thought dating was pretty attractive.  What?  Why don’t I lay down the law?  I did.  When they were small.  I taught them the law (Word).  When they become teens, I want them to make choices.  I want them to fall on their faces a few times (or more) while they are still under my roof and they can receive counsel from me.

What if your teen entertains the idea of premarital sex?  Did homeschooling parents fail? What if your teen questions your faith?  Who failed?  No one.  Your children will eventually make their own choices.

I love teens because they are not afraid to ask the hard questions.  They take foundation you built for them and take a chisel to it to make sure it is solid.  While the dust settles -pray.  Your teen may make some bad decisions.  Pray.  Converse.  Counsel.  Don’t expect perfection.  He may fail out of college.  He may try alcohol.  He may join  another church. Don’t fret.  Don’t blame it on homeschooling.  Homeschooling doesn’t produce perfect children, but it does give them a great Biblical foundation to fall back on.  It does give them the ability to think.  Don’t freak out if they do think or question.  God can take it.  He can also draw them back to HIM.  The Holy Spirit can bring a memory verse to mind when they are thinking about choosing the wide road.

Train a child up in the way he should go, And even when He is old He will not depart from it. – Proverbs 22:6

When he is old he will not depart from it.  Some people are old at sixteen.  Some are old at thirty.  Don’t expect your kids to be perfect because you homeschool.

With that said, I don’t want you to get the wrong idea.  I love my teens.  They are intelligent, well-spoken and have fallen on their faces a few times. They are willing to listen to instruction.  They don’t always heed it, but they listen.  One of my teens said that I am the voice inside his head, kinda like those geography songs we listened to, but instead of “the northern border of the united states”, I am replaying all the things I ever taught him. He admits to arguing with the voice.

What can you do?  Pray.  I know, I said that.  Take every opportunity to pour into your kids. I’m not talking about doing extra worksheets.  I’m talking about deep conversation.  When a teen wants to talk at 10pm (past my bedtime). Talk.  When he fails, pray with him.  Counsel him. Love the sinner.  Hate the sin. Give the teen firm, but natural consequences.  When your house is full of his friends and they want to talk about gay rights, listen.  Answer.  Be a sounding board.  One of my blog posts a few weeks ago originated from a conversation with a group of teens.

If you are considering homeschooling and you read this thinking, why try homeschooling then?  Why?  Because homeschooling gives your the opportunity to pour on the Word while your children are young.  You can redeem the time because the days are evil.  Just don’t put all your eggs in the homeschooling basket.  If your kids go to public or private school, don’t put your eggs in that basket either.  Pray.  Pour on the Word. Converse.  Listen.

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4 thoughts on “My biggest frustration

  1. This is such an encouraging post, and something that I needed to read!! I think I may 'pin' it for future reference!! ( I have a feeling I'll need to be reminded again!) Thanks for sharing your experience and your wisdom!! 🙂

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