I woke tangled in the bed sheet, my mind racing….

I forgot to…

Tomorrow I have to, because I forgot, it was on my list!

Worried thoughts choked me. I sat up, too a deep breath and looked around. Nothing to fear. No monsters. No giant to do list chasing with sharpies dancing around my bed.

Just the calm, quiet of three o’clock in the morning, at least in the external world.

My inner monologue still yelled,

You didn’t finish teaching this subject yesterday!

You didn’t….

You didn’t do that either!

We mamas have a constant inner monologue that can turn into Berating Dude with a side kick named Guilt. Our plates are so full, our schedules stuffed full of educational opportunities, chores, meal planning, not to mention extra curricular activities. All this positive stuff can cause negative stress if we are not careful.

Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of ^[a]witnesses [who by faith have testified to the truth of God’s absolute faithfulness], stripping off every unnecessary weight and the sin which so easily and cleverly entangles us, let us run with endurance and active persistence the race that is set before us,

[looking away from all that will distract us and] focusing our eyes on Jesus, who is the Author and Perfecter of faith [the first incentive for our belief and the One who brings our faith to maturity], who for the joy [of accomplishing the goal] set before Him endured the cross, ^[a]disregarding the shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God [revealing His deity, His authority, and the completion of His work].- Hebrews 12: 1,2

What if we ran the race that was set before US- not the one we felt entangled in? What if we stripped off every encumbrance, those things that mentally and physically hold us back?

Those thoughts that say:

You’re going to mess up your children if you teach them at home!

You’re too disorganized to keep it all together!

You  don’t do enough ‘real’ school!

Everyone knows what they’re doing except you!

You can’t teach Algebra, you can’t even DO Algebra!

In the middle of the night, that middle of the day slump, when everything has fallen apart and you’re looking forward to nap time or that second third cup of coffee, those thoughts shove open the doors of doubt. Tell them to JUST BE QUIET!

Talk back to them if you have to!

I am the Mother chosen for these children. I am appointed to raise them and by God’s Grace, I am the best person for the job.

I am as organized as I need to be for today, if I didn’t get it today, I will try again tomorrow. God has ordered my days. I may plan my ways, but the Lord directs my steps.

A man’s mind plans his way [as he journeys through life],
But the Lord directs his steps and establishes them.- Proverbs 16:9

Commit your works to the Lord [submit and trust them to Him],
And your plans will succeed [if you respond to His will and guidance].- Proverbs 16:3

God works all things together for good (Romans 8:28). If I need changing, He can do it. If He doesn’t change me or my circumstances, I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me regardless of my circumstances or present season.

I don’t have to be a master of every subject in order to homeschool. I just have to be intelligent and resourceful enough to find resources to help my student master these areas. 

And …. I know the GREAT I AM, who is able to supply all the needs of my students.

These are just some buckets of water to toss at the fiery darts of the wicked one. If you are struggling in your thought life on your homeschooling journey as I do, take a few minutes to search the scriptures for some more water of the Word that pertains to you specifically!  You can do this!  You have the one who created the heavens and earth on your side. He does not grow weary. He doesn’t wrestle with His bed sheets at night. He is there, present with you, right now. He will never leave you, nor forsake you.

Linking up with Kristin Hill Taylor!