Welcome to the series Feigned Feminism Friday! If you missed the beginning, you can find it here. I have been answering the question: Why does today’s brand of feminism frown on women staying home to raise a family? I am working on part three today.
3.Modern feminism believes a woman’s highest calling is her career and the raising of children is a secondary and lesser role.
This point refers to point number one, FEAR, in a somewhat distorted way. This is not to say that women aren’t brilliant and only valuable in a suburban home driving a mini van or on a farm in the middle of Iowa raising pigs and children.
You see, part of the distortion of modern feminism is the fact that it is out of balance, it says women are only valuable if they fit in the confines of the liberal feminist box or in the propaganda picture portrayed, bored, over-sexed (affairs), unintelligent morons who do nothing but clean up poop and sling macaroni into a pot.Don’t believe me, just watch a little TV. Any moron can do that, right?It takes a super intelligent woman who can overcome the slavery of tradition and work on a higher degree and get herself on the career path. She is free, right? Her intelligence has evolved and surpassed that of a man and her true self, her true worth can shine through, makes sense, right? Her opponents are silenced as she climbs the ladder of success. What could they (whoever they are) say now? She has won. She has defeated the hold of “old fashioned” and “traditional values”. She has won. She has conquered all and her adversaries bow down.
Her children arise early and go to day care. Her husband takes turns with carpool, picking up dinner at a drive through and carting the kids to sports/extra curricular activities. The world is balanced. There are several problems with this sort of life and thinking. Those who live it, know it is not picture perfect. It is stressful for the whole family. Everyone is always headed different directions. Division. Divorce. Depression. All those D words follow each other. The great military strategy, divide and conquer. Get one part of the family here, another here and isolate. Multiply the number of uncontrollable influences on your children and your marriage. Add the multiple hours of media consumed and see what happens to the recipe of family, it gets burnt.
You see, children are not cattle who only need to be fed chicken nuggets and macaroni. They are intelligent human beings with a need for connection, attachement, with parents first. Children need someone to love, something to think about and something to do (purpose). A day care cannot provide these. And the result is, in modern America with its high standard of living, households full of food and servants: dishwashers, washers, dryers and vacuums, there is an epidemic of unattached children searching for connection and longing for purpose. Their minds are hungering for relevant information.
“Why is it so dark before the sun comes up?”
Kids crave companionship. “Lie down with me Mommy, I’m scared.”
They hunger for relationship and building those takes longer than fifteen minutes of bedtime routine after dinner.
Teen suicide is on the verge of explosion and its savage fingers are reaching down into the ranks of younger children who doubt their purpose and their place in this world, all while Mom and Dad pursue important careers.
You may think I’ve gotten off topic and this is just a rant. I haven’t. It’s not. If you are crying while reading this, you are not alone. I am too. As is the God who created family. He weeps at the destruction of His holy plan. Family.
And if you are a woman wondering what the point is of staying at home when someone else can make the peanut butter sandwiches, you are right. Someone else can, but YOU oh mother of those blessings are the one who can connect with those children. You can promote brain development through connection. You can give them healthy things to think about by reading aloud, discussing and answering their questions. Do you know who is doing that for them now, if anyone? You can teach them their purpose in this world by giving them work to do and helping them pursue their gifts. Is that happening in their lives or are they wasting their youth in front of TV and video games until the fake magical moment of adulthood when they are supposed to have all their ducks in a row. Will they crack under the pressure of the cultural norm and turn to the false gods of sex, drugs and alcohol (cause that’s the norm, right?).
Here’s a good self-test. Try it. When you were a child, what did you desire more than anything? Come on, picture a scene. I bet it wasn’t an empty house (except for you) alone with a TV.
- Is is Mom and Dad cheering in the stands for you at a sporting even and then the after glow of home eating ice cream together?
- Or sitting on your Mama’s bed while she read to you, ignoring the clock?
- Or in the in the kitchen making cookies from scratch, getting flour everywhere and laughing about it, cause it’s just flour?
- Or one of mine: (my mother was a writer) standing in her office piecing together columns and then going out to lunch, just the two of us, her ordering for me because I was too shy (true story)
The truth is…...being a stay at home Mom takes a wise, efficient, well-rounded woman. She must nurture her children as well as provide her children with educational meat to chew on. She must point them to purpose. Women aren’t running a beef farm, fattening up children with physical food, only meeting physical needs. If that’s what you think staying home means, you will have dinosaur children, small brain, large body. Your children will be selfish and unfulfilled and so will you (but’s that’s another topic).
A woman’s highest calling is not career. That is secondary. Her highest calling is to fulfill the role that God has given her with wisdom and intelligence. If you don’t believe that stay at home Moms need to be well balanced, informed and educated, then you are following another sort of Pied Piper. Get off the path, plug your ears and get back to sanity.
“[These weak women will listen to anybody who will teach them]; they are forever inquiring and getting information but are never able to arrive at a recognition and knowledge of the truth.”- II Timothy 3:7
Read a book. Listen to some educational podcasts. Add some virtue and knowledge to your life. In exercising knowledge, you develop self-control. In exercising self-control, you develop steadfastness. In exercising steadfastness, you develop godliness. Ladies, we can become the godly center of our home. Our children will arise and call us blessed. Our husbands can depend on us. One family at a time, we can rebuild the infrastructure of community, city and nation.