What Do You Want Your Life To Look Like?

What do you want your life to look like?

Often instead of focusing on what we would like our life to look like, we focus on what is wrong with our lives.
We say things like:
My house is a mess.
I really need to lose this weight.
I should do some laundry.
I need to have a quiet time in the morning before the kids get up.

Even if all of those things are true, thinking of them in the negative only stresses us more. Instead of thinking “I am more than a conqueror” or “I am self-sufficient in Christ’s sufficiency” we begin to think “I can’t” or “I’ll never have the life I want.” No one wants to live there.

Change your Mindset


Although I can’t promise the exercise I’m going to prescribe will make all of your obstacles go away, I do know it can help you change your mindset. With a more positive mindset, it’s easier to pursue your purpose. Remember yesterday, we spilled our dreams onto paper? Today’s exercise will help you visualize what that looks like in real everyday life so you can start working towards that vision. I’m not talking about some hokey pokey incantations and incense burning. I’m talking about imagining your perfect day and writing it down. The first time I tried this exercise, I was still homeschooling and trying to make the days as efficient, effortless, and educational as possible. That’s saying a lot, I know. But if we aim for nothing except surviving, that’s all we will do.


Nobody wants to just survive.


It had been my God-sized dream to homeschool. I was doing it! The only problem was – my vision and my reality weren’t synonymous. They were opposites. I decided to give writing down what I wanted my life to look like a try.
My perfect day looked pretty simple.
I wake early, make coffee, have Bible study time before the kids get up. I make breakfast for the kids and we eat at the table. We have fifteen minutes of chore time before we start school. We do Bible study and other group subjects together first. We have a snack together at 10 am. Then we divide into individual subjects.

I won’t share the whole day. You get the picture. The point is writing down what my perfect day looked like gave me something to aim for. Many times we just get up and hope that things will happen on their own and we beat ourselves up when they don’t. Then we feel powerless and as if we have failed. How can we say we failed when we don’t even know what we are aiming for?

“Do what you love, and you’ll stop being your own worst enemy.”

– Tommy Newberry, Success is Not an Accident

Don’t confuse what you love with entertainment. What you love is living your purpose today and doing it in the best way possible. Living your purpose starts with writing down what it looks like on a day to day basis.
Take the intersection of what you wrote yesterday with what you imagine your perfect day looks like (realistically) and write it down.
Don’t stress about goals and objectives just yet!

Brainstorm Your Dreams/Vision

Brainstorm Your Dreams/Passion

If you read and did yesterday’s assignment, you’ll have at least one of your passions pinpointed. Today, I’m going to list some questions to help you do some brainstorming. Brainstorming is a no-judgment activity. When brainstorming your passion, write down your ideas no matter how crazy they sound!


“How you see yourself on the inside sets the ceiling for what God can do with you on the outside. Your life here on earth is your special, unrepeatable opportunity to magnify the greatness God has placed within you.”

Tommy Newberry, Success is Not an Accident


We are designed to have a deep sense of purpose. When we live contrary to design, we end up feeling frustrated and lost. The problem is, most of us don’t take the time to dream. We don’t take the time to write or speak what we are called to do. We can get so caught up in living other people’s God-sized dreams that we don’t even acknowledge our own.


Here’s an example from my own life. I dug out an old journal to find this just for you!

You have not chosen Me, but I have chosen you and I have appointed and placed and purposefully planted you, so that you would go and bear fruit and keep on bearing, and that your fruit will remain and be lasting, so that whatever you ask of the Father in My name [as My representative] He may give to you.

– John 15:16

“Thank you for your Word. Thank you for the word “steadfast” (my word of the year in 2017). Thank you that even though my body is tired from this new schedule, I can remain steadfast and form new habits that make things more manageable… Thank you that this whole thing -writing-is not about me or how much I can do or how organized I can be, it’s about You, Your plan, Your ways.”

I was in a major transition in 2017. My homeschooling career had come to an end and I was transitioning into becoming an author. I had a new purpose but it took my habits a while to change. My body had to adjust to my new purpose. If you are wondering if I stayed the course, yes, I have. I wake up early to write with no problem now.

If I can do it, you can. Take some time today and brainstorm your dreams! (Don’t worry about goals and objectives right now, just dream!!) Below are the questions I promised to get you started!

What have you secretly always wanted to pursue?
What is the one activity you immerse yourself and lose all track of time?
What does your heart yearn to do more of?

*This one may take some quiet time. Block out what you see on social media or even what your church friends are doing. Looking at what others are doing can cloud our vision. Step away, find somewhere quiet, and be honest with yourself.

Plan Out Your Vision/Goals Through Journaling

*Week 2 of a month of journaling

“Unless the Lord builds the house, the builders labor in vain.”

-Psalm 127: 1

Before we even start with this week’s topic, I wanted to share the scripture above. Planning a vision isn’t about exotic vacation homes or thousand dollar purses. It’s about what your purpose on this earth is. It’s about building a life that will bless others. Having a God-sized dream is all about God, not us. He has given us gifts, talents (see Matthew 25: 14- 30), and life experiences. He wants to use them in a specific way. This also doesn’t mean you’re going to be Insta famous (unless God wants you to). This is all about where ministry, mission, and motivation all intersect. Think about this for a moment. With no time constraints, financial constraints, or health issues, what would you do? I’m not talking about vegging in front of the tv, I mean what would you work at? What excites you? Home design? Baking? Photography? Writing. Homeschooling? Organization? Running a food pantry? What is the thing you do which makes you lose all track of time because you are so into it? This can be different for each season of your life. And here’s the kicker, it should be something that lines up with the Word of God. Right now, where do you park your passion? Take a moment and write down the answer.

Examine Your Feelings Regularly

Examine Your Feelings
So, yesterday’s assignment was just the beginning of making sense of your feelings. If you have journaled every day and followed the assignments, YAY YOU! You know what’s next? Don’t stop. Keep the practice of journaling going. Use journaling to examine your feelings whenever you need to.
Just a warning, if you are a number one on the enneagram, in other words, a perfectionist, you may get two days in and miss a day and then quit because you can’t journal perfectly. This isn’t about perfection. It’s about progress. (Kristin’s mantra for 2020 which I borrow often).
You don’t have to journal every day. Maybe put your journal somewhere you can see it and then use it for emotional emergencies or just some fun exercises. Not sure what do next and you want to keep journaling?
Check out this article – “Self-Care Journaling Prompts for each Enneagram Type.”
Next week, we’ll delve into using journaling to plan your goals/vision! You don’t have to do this on New Year’s Eve. Anytime is a good time to plan a new goal.

Confront Your Feelings

Confront Your Feelings
You may think we did this yesterday, not quite. We owned our feelings. Consider this example – I own a car. I say, “I own that midnight blue Rav4.” Confronting my car is like saying, I own it and it seems low on gas, what am I going to do about that? Maybe you did the assignment yesterday and it was overwhelming. Maybe you finally own that you are anxious, angry, or depressed, now what? Now we confront those feelings. Confronting our feelings means we are the boss of them. We don’t have to be ruled by them just because we acknowledge them. We don’t have to let them lead us into sin or moral decay. Just because we realize we are angry with our spouse doesn’t necessarily mean we need to get a divorce (I’m not talking about abusive situations here, that’s different). Consider this excerpt from “5 Ways to Win Spiritual Battles in Your Emotions”:

“Satan often attacks Christians through our emotions. We can be thinking with correct beliefs, yet still fall victim to evil through feelings that tempt us to sin: lust, anger, fear, jealousy, discouragement, etc. Sometimes we discount the importance of paying attention to our emotions day by day, thinking that the right convictions should be enough to strengthen us against evil. Yet, when attacks come into our lives, they often enter by way of our emotions.”

– crosswalk.com

Before you think I have changed my mind about acknowledging, feeling, and owning our emotions, remember if we stuff our emotions, it can have a negative impact on our health. Those three steps of acknowledging, feeling, and owing are important in spiritual warfare. You can confront your emotions by looking up and copying scriptures about them. Yep. We need the word to win the war over acting on our negative emotions. Your assignment today is to write down one negative emotion you feel on a regular basis. Then using a concordance, look up a verse on that emotion/feeling. Copy it down. Read it to yourself when you are struggling with confronting your emotions. Here’s an example:
I feel anxious a lot.
After the feeling, write down a scripture to combat it, such as:

6 Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; 7 and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.

– Philippians 4: 6-7