Get Intentional About Playing and Moving

Are you suffering from circumstantial depression?

Are you too tired to move?

Too worn out to play?

Or maybe you never learned to play as a child?

Some seasons of our lives, we just don’t feel like moving.

Why get intentional about moving and play?

One thing we have to get intentional about is playing and moving. We moms can get so caught up in the doing, that we forget about being. I’m not talking about vegging on Netflix or Amazon. I’m talking about intentional play for you and your children. Play builds brains, fuels logic, and gets bodies moving.

Play Therapy was developed in the 1970s to help families learn how to do intentional play with their children. It’s an important part of parenting. It stimulates brains and the relationship part of the playing grows the brain. Did you know that? Relationships grow the brain. So, the play I’m talking about is interactive.

  • A walk on the trail picking up nature and identifying it together.
  • A tea party.
  • Playing with Play doh.
  • Archery practice.
  • Board games.

All of these activities are work for children. We all have jobs. A child’s job is to find out how the world works -what the physical laws of nature are, how relationships work, how to get along. how to win, how to lose, how to build character.

These are all done through play/work. 

Have you ever thought of play this way before?

I’m not talking about “go to your room and play by yourself.” There’s a place for that. In fact, kids are more willing to play by themselves after their emotional tank is full. We mom are the gas that fuels their tank. If you have boys, the last sentence should hit your funny bone. We co-regulate with our kids, we teach them how to play.

YOu’re never too old to Play

Some of us don’t know how to play well as adults, because no one taught us or we think we are too old for play. We’re never too old to play. It’s okay. We can have fun. We can make a mess. Remember Moms, we are the boss and the employee. If the boss says we can have a water fight, we can. Then the employee can clean it up ( that’s us too).

One year, we had moved to a new town and didn’t know anyone. I was suffering some of my own circumstantial depression and God told me to do something fun with each child every day. It was hard. It was fun. We grew closer that year as a family, more than any other time.

We had squirt gun battles, game nights, roller blades on the driveway. Hiked. Biked. Did scavenger hunts at Cabela’s. 

The point is, don’t wait to want to. Do it when you don’t feel like it.

Moving.

Mamas, we have to move. We do a lot of moving with babies, laundry and dishes, cooking and the like, but with all of our servant appliances, we don’t work as hard as Moms of the past used to. We can easily become couch potatoes in between jobs. Couch potato-ing makes us feel sluggish. Our lymph nodes fill with toxins that don’t drain without proper exercise. We get headaches, backaches and cranky attitudes. We need to move. Guess what, it takes the investment of time and energy. You can do it! You can! Find an accountability partner. If you want to see your children grow up, graduate, get married, and have children, you have to start working on moving today. Not some day when you have the time. Now is the time to move and play.

Nutrition has Been Thrown out the Window! How can we get it back?

We’re doing a Back to Basics Series here on The Whole House. This week we’re focusing on brain development. If you missed the beginning of the series start here.

What does food have to do with brain development? Everything. You’ve heard the old saying, “You are what you eat?” That’s not just for grownups. As teens and children, we are told we have a fast metabolism and we can eat anything. But, should we?

Should you be concerned about what your kids are eating? Or should you just wait until they are old enough to know better?

The value of good nutrition.

“When you child eats regular, balanced meals and snacks, blood sugar levels remain constant and steady. This boosts learning and stabilizes moods. When we cheat ourselves out of meals, however, we’re also reducing our brainpower. Skipping breakfast or snacking on sugary sodas and sweets are just some of the ways that our daily habits can undermine healthy brain functioning.” –The Connected Child

Good nutrition isn’t just counting calories. When my newbies came home through adoption, they had health issues, including rotten teeth and malnutrition. The dentist informed me the rotten teeth were a result of the malnutrition. My kids hadn’t had access to sugary sodas or candy. The kind of calories my kiddos needed were specific and intentional. They needed protein and complex carbohydrates to grow their bodies and their brains. All kids do.

Deficiencies go hand in hand with a variety of health and behavioral problems. ADHD and diabetes have been linked to a shortage of magnesium. I’m not a doctor or a scientist, maybe you are in the same boat, but you want your child to have optimal health and brain function. My advice? Do some research. That’s what I did when my kiddos come home. Don’t take my word for it.

My youngest son, who is on the spectrum ate gluten-free for years because it “calmed his inner hulk” (his words). Children who have health and behavioral problems may need more vitamins and minerals in the form of a supplement. It’s not a cure, just support. It may be the difference between their inner hulk raging all the time and just making appearances.

“A growing and compelling body of research suggests that nutritional supplementation is extremely beneficial for at-risk populations. In one study at a Canadian hospital, two boys with explosive rage and volatile moods showed dramatic improvement – without lithium or other traditional psychpharmacolic agents – when they took a daily vitamin and mineral supplement. When taken off the nutritional supplement, their rage returned, but once the supplementation was restored, their behavior improved again.” – The Connected Child

Maybe your child is neurotypical.  Maybe he doesn’t have any capital letter syndromes or behavior issues. Should you be concerned about his nutrition? YES!

Eight years ago, I watched a Teresa Tapp seminar about health and nutrition. She said something that haunts me to this day. If we don’t change our eating and exercise habits, then this generation will have more serious health issues in their thirties and forties as opposed to their seventies and eighties our grandparents did. I’m serious paraphrasing here, but she said if we don’t start eating God-made (closest to their natural form) foods and moving, our kids could end up in nursing homes in their forties. YIKES! We don’t want that._The food your child eats becomes the building blocks of his or her brain chemistry._

Throw out the myth that because our kiddos have fast metabolisms, they can eat anything and everything. Food is fuel. Food is medicine. We must fuel our kiddos’ bodies with what will grow healthy brains. What they are eating now is building their future body, brain, and immune system.

“The food your child eats becomes the building blocks of his or her brain chemistry.” – The Connected Child

Just a few tips from The Connected Child to end on. You may already have a handle on this, if so, GO YOU! Maybe you just need a restart, some reminders to get you back on track. I need those often!

  • Make sure your kiddos drink lots of water! Dehydration cause mental (cognitive) function to deteriorate. (I notice this in myself. If I have been working at my desk for hours, I start craving coffee and sweets. I get a quart of lemon water instead and feel fresh and ready to go!)
  • Avoid deep-fried foods. They make the brain sluggish.
  • Use yogurt as a healthful snack.  The live cultures improve digestions and intestinal health. The intestines help produce serotonin, the feel good neurotransmitter. Get the whole fat kind with lower sugar content. Kids need good fats! Don’t do fat-free! Use probiotic supplements for kiddos who can’t do dairy!
  • Keep a food dairy. I love this suggestion. Sometimes we don’t know what the food offender is until we take the time to write down reactions.

Get your kiddos eating as many God-made foods as can and go you! Every time you get nutrition and water in your kiddos, you are enabling better brain function. You’re building strong bodies and immune systems for a long and healthy life.

 

 

Mind, Mood, and Attitude Show Notes

It’s easy to have a great attitude when life is great. What about when everything is going wrong? How do you keep a great attitude then?

On this week’s episode of The Whole House Podcast, Diane Tarantini and I share some of our Job syndrome stories as well as what God taught us through them.

  • Whether it is physical, financial or emotional circumstances, we can learn to ask God to change us in the midst of the crisis.
  • Often, just doing the next thing in the midst of the circumstances teaches steadfastness.
  • When physical sickness or an injury limits what we can do physically, we have to watch our emotional response.
  • When our negative emotions are in overdrive, we can quickly form toxic responses.
  • It takes 21 days for certain protein changes to happen in the brain, – for the new memory to become self sustaining and for the old memory to be broken down.

It takes three cycles of 21 (63) days to completely form a new thought pattern.

  • By day 7, the protein connection holding the memory in place is a bump shape, day 14, a lollipop, by 21 it is a mushroom. YOU must repeat the 21 day cycle three times for a thought to become automated.

Awareness is the process of bringing thoughts into captivity.

Episode 59

Our signals come from two sources:

  1. External- 5 senses.

  2. Non conscious- metacognitive (your memories).

You have to develop disciplined thought lives, and part of that is increasing awareness of what you are allowing in your mind. Be aware of the signals coming in and understanding the internal environment of your mind.

When you think, you also feel. When you think a thought, you also bring up an attached emotion.  Emotions and feelings are different.

Attitude is a state of mind – a thought plus its attached emotion. Attitudes influence what you say and do.

If the attitude activated is negative, then the emotional response will be a negative or stressful feeling.

If the attitude is positive, the feeling will be positive. Your attitude will be revealed no matter how much you try to hide it. So, you say, “I’m in a bad mood.”

Research has shown that mental practice -imagination, visualization, deep thought and reflection produces the same physical changes in the brain as would physically carrying out the same imagined process.

 

Brain scans show that the parts of the brain activated by action are the same parts activated by simply thinking about an action. This shed new depths and understanding for the scripture – Faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.”- Hebrews 11:1

 

As young women, we often live our lives as if our energy is finite. We  live as if we have unlimited energy and we hit our thirties, forties and fifties and realize we begin to have major health issues. If you are young, you can learn the lesson now- 

You can’t do everything, but you can do one or two things well.

It’s best to practice making choices now before stress and physical symptoms crop up. If you choose to do what is essential now, your body will thank you later. So will your family. If what is essential to you is God, husband and children, then the things outside of this scope are not essential. If you have the mindset that you can do it all, you will eventually face the consequences. If you use the measuring stick of what is truly essential for you today, the consequences will be positive tomorrow. 

As a young stay-at-home Mom, I used to volunteer for things thinking – this will only take an hour. In truth, with the driving, planning, preparing and getting out the door, the hour turned into four or five. When I returned home, I was tired and cranky. I had used all my reserves for someone else. What was essential? What was my priority? My family. My little children who had no idea why I was not happy or why church stuff made me unhappy.

It was a disservice to God, first of all for me to say yes when my insides were saying no (quietly) and I reasoned it away. It was, and still can be a disservice to my family because my witness to them became – God, church, and all of that just makes people cranky. My attitude was not one of gratitude.

My kiddos are grown now. This doesn’t mean I suddenly have unlimited energy and time. I still must choose what is essential. I also have the added limitation of several immune system disorders. With that in mind, I must choose ONLY what is essential for me, not what others say is essential. I have tried that route. It only ends up affecting my body and no one else’s.

Once my energy envelope is empty, my mind, mood and attitude suffer and I have no one to blame except myself.

The way of the Essentialist means living by design, not by default. Instead of making choices reactively, the Essentialist deliberately distinguishes the vital few from the trivial many, eliminates the non-essentials, and then removes the obstacles so the essential things have clear, smooth passage. — Greg Mckeown

Many of the aspects of our mood and attitude we have control over. We can say “no” when we mean it. We can strip our calendars of things that we know are not our “best yes”.

We don’t have to do everything. We should never take on responsibility in order not to hurt someone’s feelings. They can take care of their own feelings. If whatever it is isn’t your primary responsibility is, let it go.

 

 Here are some of the resources mentioned on the show:

Dr. Caroline Leaf

Urban Woman Syndrome

You can listen to the podcast here:

Untitled design (2)Untitled design (1)

Make sure you sign up here to follow us by email to get your free gift and receive notifications of a new post, plus our monthly newsletter!

 

 

Five Day Smoothie Challenge!

Hey Friend,

  • Thanksgiving may have been a great success and if you’re like me, you’re reliving all the fun moments in your mind. We have a fresh pocketful of memories. We may also all have some other habits too. Such as I-have-to-eat-all-the-leftovers-syndrome. I know. I feel as if not eating is wasting it. I remember what my step-father Bud used to say, “It looks better in the trash then it does on me.” He was certainly not a wasteful person, so for him to say that means a lot. The truth is, there comes a point at which we have to ask ourselves –
  • Why am I eating this?
  • Do I need it?
  • Is it helping me or hurting me? 

We don’t have to eat everything. We need to stop and ask our bodies what they need. Years ago, when I was diagnosed with Celiac disease, my gut was shredded. My muscles had wasted away and I felt more than exhausted. I felt angry that my body wouldn’t cooperate with whatever I put in my mouth. It pretty much rejected everything. I started learning more about what foods my body needed. My first step was smoothies. Not necessarily green, but packed with good foods and nutrients.

Honestly my first attempt tasted like poop. Wait. Worse. I think. I just got a bunch of kale, spinach and whatever else I could stuff in the blender and poured the result in a mason jar. My daughter, who joined me on this adventure, took a tentative sip and spit it out. I did the same.

With some more research, some more playing around, I found some smoothies that worked for me. I did some smoothie fasts (just drinking smoothies) and finally settled on replacing my morning meal with one. That’s not super hard! Are you in? One smoothie every morning for five days?  In fact I felt full and energetic and most days would realize by late afternoon that I hadn’t eaten lunch because I wasn’t hungry (that’s not the purpose, just a point).

I’m going to share five of those on our Instagram account next week – November 26th- 30th. 

46779877_265208877678831_7877115646025138176_n.jpg

Smoothies are not a quick fix or a cure-all, but they have a host of benefits:

1) Natural Weight Loss.

2) Boost Fruit & Vegetable Intake (Particularly Greens)

3) Increased Energy.

4) Boosts Nutrition.

5) Strengthens Immune System.

6) Excellent Source Of Minerals For Healthy Bones.

7) Excellent Source of Antioxidants.

8). Supports Colon and Gut Health.

*You can find more benefits at DaveandTracy.com or research some on your own!

Are you ready to join me? Here’s a list of ingredients you’ll want to grab before Monday morning. If you can’t purchase them all, no worries. You can still do the challenge and modify a bit. I’m all about tweaking recipes.

  • Almond milk
  •  Plain Kefir or whole fat greek yogurt
  • Avocados
  • Granny smith apple
  • Protein powder
  • Spirulina
  • Cacao
  • banana
  • pumpkin
  • carrot juice
  • spinach
  • cinnaman
  • blueberries (I use frozen from the Guire Farm)
  • mint
  • Kiwi (optional)
  • coconut water

Like I said, don’t feel as if you need to buy all of these. If you just use one or two of the recipes this coming week and repeat them, that’s still a win!

On Monday, I’ll be sharing one of my favorites (I say that for all of them)- Green apple-Avocado!

Join us on Instagram for the challenge – @the_whole_house!

Need an extra boost of encouragement to keep healthy over the holidays? Hop on over to iTunes and listen to “Keeping Healthy over the Holidays.”

 

21 Days to a More Confident You E-Course

It takes 21 days to make or break a habit. Let’s BREAK the habit of self doubt and low self esteem and MAKE a habit of standing strong in our God given confidence and be unapologetic about it.

Being YOU is MORE than enough!!

This e-course will guide you with:

– scripture; to help you see yourself through the eyes of Christ

– movement; to celebrate our body’s ability to just move

– mindful eating; to help develop self awareness when it comes to food

“Confidence is all about being positive in what you can do and not worrying about what you can’t do.”

31781828_10216232953405274_17381238725672960_n.png

 

Jessica is a daughter of God, wife, mother and entrepreneur – in that order. Her passion has, at times, been her stronghold. This has left her feeling obligated to share her struggles along with her victories to help others attempting to overcome the same hurdles. She specializes in helping women practice self love through movement & self awareness. It took her a long time to see herself through the eyes of Christ and if she can shorten that duration for others, she’s living her purpose.

The 3 tools that helped me get out of the cycle of dysfunctional eating/yo-yo dieting (which lead to a whole lot of self loathing) and find my peace with my body are what this e-course focuses on.

Scripture – It wasn’t until I was able to see myself the way God sees me that I was able to free myself from the stronghold of vanity/image issues and live in peace knowing that I am enough. Exactly where I am, I am enough in HIS eyes. Only time in scripture pointed this out to me. I withdrew from anything that wasn’t serving any purpose in my “recovery” and dove straight into daily devotional time. I deleted some of my social media accounts and the ones I did keep, I vowed to stop engaging with as much. The first thing I check in the morning switched from my Facebook feed, which usually set the tone for my entire day (which always ended in me being offended by something), to my Bible app. First, the verse of the day, and then devotional time. The words of my father now set the tone for my day and his tone is always that of love and acceptance and CONFIDENCE. Meditating on his words daily help to reassure you that, with him, you can not fail. Psalm 46:5 says it all… “God is within her, she will not fail;”

Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.

1 Peter 3:4

Movement – I had to have a long conversation with myself. I had to convince myself that I needed to move my body with more PURPOSE instead of just moving my body more… I had become a slave to movement. My life revolved around burning a certain amount of calories or taking a certain amount of steps or whatever, instead of my life revolving around God. That is first and foremost.

1 Timothy 4:8 says it like this; “For physical training is of some value, but godliness has value for all things, holding promise for both the present life and the life to come.”

I went from overtraining to finding balance and peace in my workouts by extending grace to myself, coming to a realization that ANY movement, especially movement that I enjoyed, was good enough no matter how many calories I burned. Workouts should be fun, something you enjoy and celebrated!! Aim for at least 30 minutes of movement a day. ANY KIND OF MOVEMENT. What do you enjoy doing? DO THAT!! Self love through movement. That’s our goal here.
Mindful Eating – Just like I became a slave to movement, I became a slave to eating. What I was eating, when I was eating, what it weighed, what carb count it had, how many calories, YOU KNOW THE DRILL. I was OBSESSED. I would restrict myself to the point of starvation, binge and then self loathe. That was my cycle. A cycle of disordered eating. Sound familiar?

During the peak of my disordered eating episodes, I was consumed with food in one way or the other 19 hours a day. The only time I wasn’t was when I would sleep. I would wake up starving but force myself to fast until noon. I would be craving something as simple as broccoli and deny myself of it because it didn’t fit into my “plan”. Read that again, MY PLAN, not God’s. Do you think that anywhere in God’s plan for us there’s self loathing to the point of physical starvation? No.

As a matter of fact; John 15:15 says I have been chosen and God desires me to bear fruit. He wants you to know that YOU ARE GOOD ENOUGH. He equipped you with everything you need to bear fruit, to be plentiful. A plentiful tree is not starving in any aspect of it’s nutritional needs.

I had to make a decision. I had to let go of the controlling relationship I had with food or I had to let this continue to consume and ruin my life from the inside out. I know it sounds dramatic but being stuck in a dysfunctional cycle of eating and dieting can take a pretty hefty toll on all aspects of our lives. I wasn’t going to let that happen so I knew I needed to become self aware of my damaging actions, triggers and fears associated with food and I started reading up on intuitive eating. Intuitive Eating is an approach developed to help people heal from the side effects of chronic dieting. … An intuitive eater is defined as a person who “makes food choices without experiencing guilt or an ethical dilemma, honors hunger, respects fullness and enjoys the pleasure of eating.

I have not mastered this yet but I am a whole lot better at eating without any guilt whatsoever than I was even six months ago. It is not always easy but it beats dieting up one side and down the other. Why don’t more people speak the truth about intuitive eating? BECAUSE IT DOES NOT SERVE THE DIET CULTURE’S NEED TO MAKE YOU ASSOCIATE FOOD WITH GUILT. God would not want us to harbor guilty feelings for giving our body nutrients via a sandwich for lunch instead of a salad. So why would we give society the power to do that to us?

By listening to our bodies and adapting to intuitive eating habits, we learn to rid our fears and guilt associated with foods and focus on fueling our bodies with what it is NEEDING and when it is NEEDING it. Notice no where in there did I say “what your bodies WANT”. We will explore that difference throughout this course.

Interested in joining 21 Days to a More Confident You? Hop on over here and click!